Lessons from 250 Episodes! How to Reach Your Family Goals By Being Consistent

I just want to say right now, you are the reason for my diet pill addiction early on in life. This is so wrong. Oh, my God. This is not. This is. These are lies that are being told right now. And you blamed it on. Talk about manipulation. There it is right there. Help me, Mary. Help me. Help me. I've gotten out of control. Help me. And I take the prize away. What are you doing? What? Hello and welcome to another episode of the Family Business with the Alessi's. I'm Steve Alessi and today I am in the podcast booth with Mary Alessi. That's right. And we are celebrating something pretty special during this episode. We're talking about our 250th episode. Amazing. It's really powerful. Yeah, it is. And right in line with celebrating 250 years of our country's existence, our birthday as a nation. So this particular episode is going to be filled with some interesting content. I think you'll find it very interesting. So first off, we want to say to you, if you have been enjoying our podcast, then we're getting ready for another season. Season nine, Mary. Season nine. That's huge. It's incredible in the podcast world. Yeah, it is. So we're getting ready for season nine and if you have topics, questions, things that you think we should be able to address, then let us know. Just send us a comment on that and let us get that content because we want to make sure we are encouraging our audience and helping our audience, of course, entertaining our audience at the same time. So we've got some content gaps and we want you to help fill it. For instance, there's one of our listeners who when we were talking about parenting, she said, can you help a single parent out, A single mom? So we're going to be able to do that. Plus in season nine, we're going to be hitting some serious issues. Yeah. And one of them in particular, that's close to my heart. I want to help our pawdience deal with addictions, whether it's drug addiction, whether it's alcohol addiction, whatever it might be, any form of substance that is controlling our lives. How do we break free from that? And I have some guests that I've invited to be a part of it. So yes, it's going to get heavy, but it's going to be impactful. So send us what you think you would like us to address. Now, up to this point, I'm doing all the talking. All the talking. Yes. This is what happened in the last podcast because I want to say one thing that we are going to also talk about. Yeah. Is some of the cultural battles we're fighting with the phones, with our kids, apps, Instagram, social media and all of that. We're gonna tackle that. The liberal mindset that's out there that our kids have to fight and how we wanna give our kids the phone and we want them to feel like, well, they're connected. But we're seeing the dangers of social media that is now moving into another generation of young people who were born seeing their parents on phones. So it's very hard to draw those lines. And even what's happening with government legislation, will there be a ban on children being able to watch or have social media on their phones under 16? Yeah. So there's a battle out there, and we're going to be talking a lot about. About that as well. I think that's an issue that parents are really fighting and are going to continue to fight because we see that. We see that with our little grandchildren that are toddlers. Screen time. No screen time. Got it. So we're going to talk about that. So we'll be able to look at those in the coming year. Now, listen, there is something that we have to say off the top, and I mean, this I'm grateful for. What is the power of consistency? Seeing it played out 250 episodes, Mary. You know, some. Some episodes, and we're going to lean into them before we're done today, are humorous and they're exciting and they're very emotional. All right. But some of them may not be all that engaging. But yet, you know, there's something about being consistent. Right. And I mean, up to this point, we have almost 80,000 audio downloads. That's amazing. Of this recording. That's one. This podcast. That's pretty impressive. Yeah. Viewers have watched 46, 000 hours of this podcast. That's powerful. All right. 1.3 million YouTube views. Yeah. Of the family business with the Alessa. It's wonderful. What's the secret behind it? Listen. It's consistency. Yeah. And I would love to be able to say on the front side of this, if there's something we can take away, why we celebrate 250 years, is that aspect right there. Yes. How important it is to stay consistent throughout our seasons of life, which so many of them hit us at different points. How important it is to be consistent through the seasons of our marriage. Yeah. Because we have that. And then through the seasons of raising kids. From being kids. Infants and toddlers. Yeah. To then being middle schoolers. High elementary and middle Schoolers and then high schoolers and then college. We've got one of our viewers that have listened to every episode. We're going to go ahead and listen to something that she says a little bit later. And now their daughter is getting ready to go off to college. They're going into a new season. And it's so important to remain consistent. Yeah. And educated and gain knowledge on parents. I think the. One of the most important things that we've talked about is, yes, our consistency, but also making sure you're looking at families who have done it right. Like they're on the other side of it. Their kids are adults, married with children. How did they do it? And not that we're perfect. We have not been perfect, but we have shared the wisdom of doing the very best we can by living by good principles, family honor, core values, respect, integrity. And we see it in our kids. And so now we have people going, how did you do it? Well, that's so important to have that family that is a role model for you so that you can glean from and learn. So we want our podcast to continue to give people the resources they need. Maybe they're just starting out. Yeah. But to. To raise their kids consistently with truth and knowledge and a guideline. You know, there isn't a manual, but there are lessons we can learn from other people. So let's go back to some of those early thoughts. When we started the podcast, we did it because we found ourselves sitting on our back porch or sitting around the table in the morning before we'd get dressed and go to work, having a cup of coffee, and we found ourselves talking about subjects that we knew people needed. And to us, that's how we prepared ourselves, even for sharing from the pulpit when we preach sermons. So that's what we want to go back to regularly. It's you and I having conversation now. Our kids have grown up and they've gotten married and now we're sharing with our pawdience what those conversations are like. Yeah. And let me just say, we are the family that talk about a lot. And I think that is one of those secret ingredients that we don't share enough. Yeah. I think there's. When people say, well, we sat around the table at dinner and we talked and we shared and we got philosophical or we really had a great conversation with the kids about this one particular subject and we went there. There are so many families going, how did you get everybody to the table? How did you start that conversation? How did you get your 15 year old to Participate. How did you get your husband to sit down and get off his phone? How did you get your wife to stop washing the dishes and come sit down? We were very intentional about taking those moments when our kids were small to have conversation. Like conversation in the Alessi family, it's part of the same thing. And when our kids moved out, some of them got married and they weren't having that as much with their spouses. They had to learn. You develop that like we did. So these conversations where we throw it out, hey, guys, what do you think about this particular subject and letting the kids give feedback? That's just a little nugget I wanted to throw in there because sometimes we don't realize that consistency of trying to. Don't give up when your 14 year old daughter has an attitude. Doesn't matter. This is a core value that will pay off big time. Hey, right there. All right. We had lunch Sunday with the family and I like dad's way. I like pulling everybody together and asking, how did it go in the service? I'm not down at the other campus. How did it go with that campus? And I like everybody's feedback. And then I also like to ask, got family members who are not on the platform but are serving in off the platform, who sometimes times may feel like their role is not as important as those that are on the platform. I like to get their involvement right. Right. So we sit down to talk. And this particular weekend, nobody helped with that conversation at all. Right. It never even got off the ground because I have adults now who are dealing with things in their life and they start to talk about it around the table and I can't rein them all in and be Big Daddy anymore. Listen to me, this is the conversation. Because now all of them are giving input on something that either they're going through or something that they read about or some sports or the World cup or whatever it might be. And I sat there this particular Sunday and I almost felt like, oh, this has changed. Yeah, it's not what it once was. And I can't think that way. I know how important it is to bring the family back to that place where everybody is made to feel like what they're doing in our business is important. Yeah. I just got to figure out a better way to do it because I don't have kids that just listen to me anymore. I got to somehow remind them of the importance of this. So. But. But I want to go back to our first days, something we said with our podcast. We said we're the Alessi. Family business. Because business is everybody. Is everybody's business. Yes. Why. Why did we say that? You know, why is that important? Yeah. And because everybody. The most important relationship in your life is your family. So it is a. It's something that has to be learned. It doesn't just come naturally to have good, healthy family members and relational back and forth. You have to work at it. So it is kind of like a business. Everybody has the business of family. I guess that's what I'm trying to say. Everybody in the world on the planet has the business, a family, and you have to learn to manage it, supervise it, be a part of it, not reject it, not turn it off, because it affects you. It's your roots. Sure. But the other part of that is this. If you don't manage your family business. Yeah. Then it becomes everybody else's business they're going to be talking about. Yeah. Your crazy family, your kids. Yeah. Your marriage. Yeah. You got to manage it. That's right. So that's the whole tagline of that. And it remains true. That's why, to us, the family has to be a priority in what we do, because it can become everybody else's business. The other thing we said is we're talking about things here in the podcast booth that we don't talk about on Sundays from the platform, because the platform has so many different people that are hearing us and they may not always know our heart. So we can't say certain things publicly anymore, especially since we may say something controversial. And with today's streaming capabilities, somebody can look at something we said and take it out of contents, content, capture what we said, and then run with it and make it seem like we said something we didn't say. Right. So we have this environment where we try to get more personal. Yeah. And we're able to get down to the brass tacks of how to build business or how to build our family, how to work through complicated matters, how to help get through the seasons of life. So we go back to our roots, because I love staying consistent with principles, and that's what we're going to be committed to doing in the future episodes, in the future season. Making sure we're dealing with stuff that is raw. Yeah. That's real, that people are going through. So I say all that to say, if you like what you are hearing in the podcast booth with us, then make sure you're liking it, make sure you are sharing it, make sure you are subscribing to it, making sure you are commenting because we do love the feedback as it helps us move on and address subject matters. But I want to go back to this, if you don't mind, Mary. The power of consistency. If we can do this for 250 episodes, it just shows us how important it is to remain consistent in every aspect of our life. And one of the reasons that is true if we can help a parent or help a couple today is this. It builds trust in people. Yeah. When I remain consistent in the way that I treat you, it builds trust in you. When I remain consistent with even my disciplines in my personal life, you can count on me. Because you know, Steve is going to do this and he's going to do it regularly, which then means if you're ever hearing that Steve did something that is not my character or you're wondering, oh, he's not here, what's going on? You're not sitting there running crazy in your mind because you know, no, that's not my husband. Right. He, he's not that kind of guy. Well, how do you know that, Mary? Because I've known him for 39 years, 40 years of marriage, and that's not how he acts. Yeah. So when we start to be consistent even with our kids in our marriage, raising kids, they know they can depend on us because we are consistent. Well, because it builds trust. And the greatest relationships are built on trust. You know, doing it the right way to help parents and even couples out there, doing it the right way for a long period of time is not learning new things over and over, like learning a new resource or a new skill or a new revelation unlocks to make this marriage or these kids better. It's knowing the right things at the beginning and doing them consistently. Just keep doing the right things every day when you get off and you forget, oh, let me go back to what I know and staying consistent, you know, Chris and Rochelle moved in with us a few months ago because they were waiting for their house to be remodeled. And Christopher is very much into gardening. He loves to get out. And I said one day to you as we were pulling out of the house, I said, I just learned something. There's no such thing as a green thumb. Everybody can have a green thumb. You just got to get outside every day and water your plants. You've got to be willing to go outside every day consistently and know mites and bugs are going to come and try to eat these leaves. Let me look through a microscopic lens and pick them off the leaf. Like, Christopher would walk me outside and go, mom, on the lime Trees. You've got to see these right here. These are bugs. Pick them off. I ain't doing that. I'm just not doing that. I'll buy a new lime tree. I'll go buy limes from the grocery store. But to him, he's growing something. There's something that is pivotal for him, but it requires. And he's willing to do the mundane, the daily, every day. So as I'm watching him over the last few months, go out there every morning, I hear the alarm, beep, beep, beep. He goes outside. What's he doing? Same thing every day, every day. And it's really. That's our mindset that we need to have towards our marriages and to raising our children. We know the things that can destroy the family from within. Avoid those things. Take note of the good things. One of the things that I love about our podcast is that we've shared a lot of the good things that people can apply right now. Now just go back to that truth. Go back and listen to them again. One of our podcast listeners, she made the same statement. She said, I go back and listen to the repeats. Well, brilliant. You're going to love the results of that, because one thing that we've tried very hard to do is apply the truth consistently to get the right results. And the recipe is the same all the time, Steve. It doesn't change. And the output is based on the input. Yeah. Sometimes you make. Because this is just how you and I are. I am so down to the nitty gritty of details. You are so above the details into big picture, and your mind goes there. So you make a statement. Like, every day. Every day. He's out there gardening every day. Well, he's not. Every other day, every two or three days. And it's great because now that he's got another kid, he realizes how challenging life is. That. Oh, now, you may, if you want to tend to your plan. Right, right. Right now you got to get up a little earlier. Right. All of that to say that with consistency in life and marriage and stuff. It's not about perfection. It's not. You don't have to do it every day. Right. But it's about persistence. All right. I didn't do it yesterday. I got to jump on it today. Right. I got to let her know how I care about her today. I got to make sure. All right, we're getting some alone time this week. Let's go out. We've been busy. Let me get some time in with her today. It's about Being persistent because life's not perfect, but we gotta show some persistence to demonstrate consistency. So when you know to be consistent, that's the primary goal. But then you mess up and you've not been consistent because life is real. Summers get hot, plants dry up, and you get sick of it. What do you do in that moment? You humble yourself and you apologize and you go, you know what? I messed up. We got off track. Let's get back on track. That is so key. People don't know that part of our marriage and of our parenting that we have gotten off track at times, and we didn't like the results. So, yeah, the everyday might make some people feel this sense of guilt or failure because I'm not a gardener in my family. I'm not out there every day like Pastor Chris. And he's pain. Well, you're right. There are some days he misses. You get tired, you get exhausted, you sleep in. That happens in raising kids. Let me tell you, the reason I say that, Mary, is because I listen to some guy. Like, there's a guy, I love him to death and comes to our church, and he's so disciplined with his exercise. So disciplined that even after a long day, he just knows, man, I'm going to the gym. I got to get in my time. And he does it. It relieves the stress, and it's like, wow. And the guy's like, doesn't have a ounce of fat on him. And he makes me sick, quite frankly, makes me sick. But he made me feel so good the last time we were talking because we were setting up something to go hang out and have some dinner with him, him and his wife. And he's like, on the text feed, hey, this is usually my workout night. But you know what? Let's go. So we got to the restaurant, he says, yeah, I came home, man, I wanted to try to get that workout in, but, you know, I'm really tired. My body's tired, right? And I figured, hey, having lunch with or dinner with Alessi is more important than working out. And he has no idea how good that made me feel, that. You know what? You're not a robot, right? You're real. You know, you're a human being. You're not this giant of a guy that's so consistent or so, so perfect, right? But he is consistent, because the next day he took a break for what he missed, wasn't perfect. But the next day, he's back in it. He was persistent. Yeah, I got to stay on point. I know what my body needs. I know what my mental health needs. I know how my career needs me to be able to deal with the stress. So he's right back in it. And I think that's so important in the way that we manage our marriage and raising our kids. Because with our kids, even. Mary, sometimes consistency will accomplish what intensity just can't. No, it's true. So I watched. You want to talk about Chris? I watched the way he. We're dealing with Marino. Just recently, I happen to notice he's three years old, he has a new brother. So his world has changed abruptly. Yeah. And he doesn't get the attention that he once did. So now he's walking around and he's, like, not listening. Right. He's not responding when I call his name. His dad tells him to do something, he's not responding. Yeah. And last night, for instance, he comes out, he sees me on the patio. He goes back in. He left the door open. So I'm telling him, marino, Marino, close the door. Marino, Marino, close the door. And I'm thinking to myself, oh, my God, does he have a hearing problem? Does he have water in his ears? So. So I want to go after him like I used to do with my own kids. Grab them by the hair. Get over here. No, that's exaggeration. All right. Was never that tough and abusive. Firm. Yes. Stern. Yes. So I. I said this morning, we. When little Marino gets up, first thing we hear, mind you, my mother's in the other room sleeping. Is. We hear cling, cling on the piano key. This morning? Yeah, this morning. Ding, ding. Which he's never done. He's never done. So he's doing that, and I hear you say, marino. And he stops for a second. A couple minutes later, ding, ding, ding. He's gonna wake up. So then it's like, there he is. He's not listening. Maybe he can't hear. So then he comes into the living room, and his dad's there now, and his dad is telling him, we got to go, Marino, go say bye bye to Papa. And he's ignoring his father. And then Chris is like. And the atmosphere was so beautiful this morning. You know, it was nice and peaceful. So it wasn't even worth having to correct him in that moment. But Chris got intense. Yeah, he did. And I was. Part of me was like, gosh, don't do that. Don't ruin the beautiful environment. Don't make it so intense in here. But he got intense, and I was like, chris, back off for a second. It's okay. Back off. But Chris knows his son, so he kept calling him over, come. No, you, this, listen to me. You're going to listen when we call you. And he's looking up at his dad, you know, and so he tells Chris, tells him what to do and he turns to come to me, but then he, he made a left and walked away. And Chris really got on him and I was like, oh, that messed up the moment. Here, here's what I think I've learned 65 years later after raising the kids. Sometimes you got to get intense, right? But the best is. Wait a minute, come here. Yeah, let's be consistent. We don't have to have these highs and lows of emotions in the moment, right? Hey, this is why what you got to do, son. And maybe I let you go for a minute and don't have to address everything so intently, but I'm not going to let the too much time go by without addressing, son, you didn't listen to me, right? Let's talk about this without blowing up and messing up the whole moment. But intensity is good. And a lot of people come running out of the gate when they're going to work out. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it every day. I'm going to do it. Now. Maybe you're not going to do it every day if you haven't done it for 20 years, but maybe you can do it every Monday and then every Wednesday and maybe every Friday. That's better than having to think, I'm going to do it every day. So consistency does play out over intensity. Yeah, I think that's the core value when you do get off and you do skip moments or you feel like you've made a mistake as a parent and you haven't been consistent like you wanted to and you're seeing the results of that and you don't know how to turn the clock back and apply consistency. We've talked about this on this podcast over and over and over again. Just go back and start doing the right things and start applying the right things. Start right now. You don't. Because it's very easy for us as parents when you've got a full time job, your kids are getting older, you have the pull of the world and all of the distractions and the entertainment and the sports and the friends and all the things that they've got going on in their lives, their schedules. It's, it's like I want to have the, the harvest of this beautiful kid, you know, and we, we get along and we're friends. We're family. How do I do that? How do I get to that place where they're obedient and they're not rebellious? Well, it. Here's the thing. It is hard. It's hard to be consistent. But you do have to make a decision as a parent. This is what we want. This is where we're going to do our very best to end up. It's not easy. Be aware of that. It's not easy. Well, it's like saying this, Mary, one anniversary dinner is going to erase weeks of neglect. Yeah. You're not, you know, you're not going to put up with that if I'm not spending regular time with you. One vacation with the family doesn't negate. You know, not talking to our kids. It's on a weekly basis. You know, you're thinking, okay, now we got vacation time, family time. It's like saying one church service is. Is going to erase a whole year of working, walking with God consistently, or one punishment is going to correct rebellion in a teenager. So. So consistency is so important, which is why I'm grateful. 250 episodes later, we're going to continue to do this for another. 251. 52, 53. And we're going to go into season nine. So why don't we do this? Let's go back to some of interesting moments. Yeah. This is fun. This particular season. Yeah. And let's respond. So there's. There's some things we're going to play here, and we got some really good feedback from you, our audience, and some. Was a little bit misunderstood, I think. So we're gonna. We're gonna watch some of these and we're gonna get our own response from the beginning of this podcast and see. What did we say? Go. I know that there's been times that I've been manipulative and didn't even put the tag of manipulation on it. Oh, hello. Confession, huh? Okay, well, you know, it goes around. How would you manipulate. How would I manipulate? Yeah, I. I manipulate. Probably through. I don't want to say it. Say it. I wish it was sex. Just so you know, that's not the case. No. But I'll give you permission to manipulate me anytime you want. With sex. Sorry, Ashley. Oh, my gosh. Sorry, Ashley. Wow. So you are a manipulator. I get. I. Maybe I am, maybe I'm not. I don't know. But I do know this. You're. You're consistent. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, you are a consistent fellow. Okay. Not manipulating. No. How. How is manipulating and sex go hand in hand? Oh, that's where you were going. You are consistent in that saying that. Well, we're talking about manipulation. Yeah. And that's where you go, wow, you. Well, I wasn't sure what you were saying, because I'm gonna take the bow. I'm gonna take the compliment. Thank you very much. It's not a compliment. What? But. Okay, well, it surely isn't a comp. You salt. Next. This is good next day on this subject matter, so I am good when it comes to next. All right, let's go. Because I want to be healthy. I want to feel good about myself, so I have to fight hard against the negativity, but not all the negativity, Steve. There's a part of me that just wants to give into it and go, well, that's 50. Welcome to my world. I'm your grandma now. It's the first time in our married life you got to worry about your waistline. Now. Now you have 30 years. But now I have. Oh, all those years, you fat shame me and guilted me into having French fries away from. Oh, my gosh. Yes. Now, I'm sorry. I repent. Yes. I just want to say right now, you are the reason for my diet pill addiction early on in life. This is so wrong. Oh, my God. This is not. This is. These are lies that are being told right now, and you blamed it on. Talk about manipulation. There it is right there. Help me, Mary. Help me. Help me. I've gotten out of control. Help me. And I take the fries away. What are you doing? What? You never took the fries away. I tried. Yeah, you got mad. I did. But you know what? I fixed the waistline problem. What did you do? It's nobody's business. Ooh, it's nobody's business. Call me. I am. I'll share the phone number with you. Of you for fixing the waistline and we both being motivating. Yeah. And, hey, you go back like most couples. My gosh, you see their wedding photos. It's so beautiful. Then you see them all these years later, and you're like, what happened? The. The weight catches up to you. Old age catches up to you, which is why it's so important to keep. Well, I'll tell you one thing that helps fix it. Pursuing the foundation. Start a podcast. Start a podcast. And have to watch yourself. You'll lose that £20 real quick. Yeah, we did. Okay, next. Come on. This is good. Like, I look at little Gianni. Oh, that's the long hair And I know that's either going to be with little or we just announced the names. No, these are just names that I have in my heart. What's the fire? We can delete that part of this. That's not to be put out there yet anyhow. Be a boy, by the way. Yes, yes, yes. Okay. Oh, So I showed my prophetic edge. Did you or did you know in advance? Know what? The names of our kids. I don't know, but can we talk about that hair and those glasses? Another reason to start a podcast. Oh, my gosh. Well, you said it. That was my fault. That haircut was my fault because I said, you need to grow your hair. Alice even looks like long. You did that for me? Okay, so you can point out my hair, but the fire. That was your deal. Was not. Yeah. You bought this new thing. You thought it would make it look like we're around the campfire. You know, it's so nice. And. And there it was. I never said. And that flame wouldn't last for like 5. 5 minutes. And we kept having to rely. I want to ask the family, did I. Was I the flame? No, no. The flame. Yeah, well, you were my flame. Oh, brother. Here we go. Consistent. Let's go. One more. Is there more? Okay, this is good. Do you want to know what a mom wants from her son? Oh, Lord, this what a mother wants is really for him to just be sweet to her. Walk in the room and hug her. Just don't be disconnected from her. Just don't be cold to her. Hug her and love her and say, mom, I love you. What do you need? You want me to take the garbage out? It's so easy. It really, really, really is easier than you think. Okay. Wow. Okay. I think she gets so emotional. I do not know. I want to just. I want to explain myself. Yeah. I never knew another man could have that kind of impact. No. And, you know, can I tell you, the comments from people were like, I think she needs to get that from her husband, not her son. I agree. Whoever said that, I'm with you, sister. I don't need to get that from my son. And that wasn't what I was going for. I was so sentimental that day. And poor Christopher, he's asking the questions and I'm. And he's looking at me like, mom, we're close. I felt so bad when it was over because I realized I started crying and I'm like, well, that's good for the podcast. People will definitely stop and watch. Why is Pastor Mary crying? But you know, again, the benefits of doing a podcast, you learn how you come across on camera. I don't know. Well, you weren't in the room for that. I know I wasn't, but I almost teared up there to see you get so emotional over something like that. Well, I was thinking about you and your mom. Oh, yeah. And I was thinking about another friend of mine and her son who had been on the outs for a while, and I was thinking about them, but I wasn't putting it in perspective that my own son's asking me that question. So when I answered it, it made it look. If you took it in a bite sized sound bite, that it looked like I was trying to say to my own son, you need to hug me. I just need from you to come in. That. That's not true at all, but whatever. It got views. Well, I did like your ponytail. Talking about hair. Well, that's for like, one of my favorite looks for you. Well, thank you. You don't do it as much as I like you to, but great look. Yeah, I make fun of your hair and you compliment me on mine all the time. Girl, you're manipulating me right now. No, it's like you're wearing an outfit today I think is so beautiful. And then yesterday you wore a cool outfit as well, and I compared both of them to what you were wearing Sunday, and then you complicated me. That's great to have a husband that back insults you. See there? I didn't say when you asked me on Sunday, hey, do you like this outfit? I didn't say no. I said it was good. Right. And you chose to wear it. But then what I saw you wear Monday and what I see you wear today, it's like you're using the podcast to air here. No, that. That's a good way to do it for your spouse. Okay. You never say no. All right. Or, you know, when she turns around, says, how does this outfit look from behind? You don't really give them. You stop talking opinion. You wait a couple days later, if you didn't like what it looked like from behind. Yeah, you. You tell her sister to tell her you bite the bullet for that day, and you wait until your sister looks terrible, and then you wait for an opportunity. When something looks good from behind, you tell them when they're wearing it, hey, that really looks great from behind. But you, you don't ever say, no, babe, that doesn't look good from behind. How long have we been married? 30 years. You think I don't know you at this Point. Oh, really? You think? I don't know. So why didn't you wear that outfit? Because I wanted to wear it. I liked it. Okay. And you know what? Sundays come around every Sunday. Actually, there's only 52 of them a year, but they keep coming around, so you have to really pick. You'll get another shot to look at me and go, I like that outfit. I know. So you're Monday and I did today. Very. Wow. Yeah. So anyhow, those were some good podcast memories. Can we talk about your outfits? Sure. You didn't like my white no. Pants I wore yesterday? No. And I didn't understand that there's a difference between cream pants that I guess are in right now, but white is not. Well, what's that about? Yeah, you got to be careful with white. Why? Well, because white on the bottom and dark on the top makes you look really short. But I didn't do dark. Oh, I did. Yeah, you did. But you like that one better than the one that I was wearing before. That was in a brown. If you're in the. If you're. If you're on a resort. In a resort in the Bahamas. Got it, got it, got it. In the office. Nah, come on, it's summer. Summer white. Well, you know what? If we're picking out each other's outfits now. Okay, now. Okay. I put on a shirt today, and I said, how's this? And you like this one, so. Yeah, because it's Jean and Jean. It looks good. Jean and Jean. I was going with a pink shirt. You were. And look. Did you do it? No, because I see, I knew your vibe. I saw. I picked up on what you were saying when you. Not even having to say it. See, guys, these. How come you didn't do that on Sunday? These are the benefits. I am so sorry that you did not like my outfit. I didn't say that two days ago. Okay, Mary here real quick before we leave this place. I find it very interesting. We got some good responses from some of our listeners. We asked them, hey, man, what do you. A couple of questions went out like, you know. And we're just joking about those outfits. By the way, guys, this is our banter. Back and forth. This is how we joke. Go ahead. After all these years. Yes, we do. Before they would be a drop down, a fight for two fights, screaming. Yeah. And you wouldn't talk to me. Me for. Okay, that's true. So we have one listener here. We're so thankful for you, Anna Maria. Golly, she is. You have been listening to the Family business podcast since the beginning. Yeah, we love you. We do. And you are so encouraging, by the way, because you. You let us know when you see us or you text us, You. You let us know, you and your husband, that you do listen. And some of the things we state during the podcast, you actually come up and tell us about it. So we're so thankful for that. You do mention that some of the challenges or changes in your family over the last five years has been your daughters navigating their teenage years in, your husband suffering some hits in his career. And if there's something that we've been able to say to help you navigate through that, wow, that's. That's a gift. That is a blessing to us, and we want to be able to do that. And then we ask you a question about the podcast topics that have impacted you over the last five years. And you said, man, what's impacted you the most is the parenting advice. Also advice as a wife, but mostly parenting. And we so appreciate that. And you're using just the example of our family at this season of our life and raising toddlers and grandkids and all that as something that has been helpful to you, and so that's important. You know, we are not psychologists or counselors in that way, but because of our role in. In our life, the way we were raised around people and just really analyzing and knowing the Bible and using those principles, it really has taught us. You know, we say this all the time. There's information, and then there's applied information. There's resources, and then there's applied resources. There's medicine, and there's medicine that you take to be better. So for us, it's not what people just listen to, because you can listen to this podcast and not apply any of the truth, and you are just truth adjacent. But when you apply what you hear and start practicing it today, putting that truth into action in your family, you will see the results in it. And that's what I love about her, because you see the results in those girls. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. And it gives them as a family, such confidence. Confidence to know they're not alone, they're not flying by the seat of their pants. And they're gonna love, you know, baby, love. What? They just sent their daughter off to college. Right? Okay. And he texts me, asking for prayer before Sunday. And then he said, do you remember when I walked her, When I walked in your office to talk about my daughter, how to raise them? She was, I think, 11 years old at the time. Right. And to see that that long term relationship that we have, staying together, walking in step with each other over these years has now allowed them to see her move into this season to step into college and listen. That girl loves God, loves the church, gets involved in the ministry. This is a kid that has not, you know, sowed wild oats. This is not somebody that's rebelled. She's on. Her parents don't have to worry about the drug addictions or the entanglements of sex for her. That's right. Not being taken in the wrong direction because of social media. This kid is strong and founded because, for one, they have her in a relationship with God, in church and listening to good advice. And by the way, this is a whole different subject we got to attack in the coming season nine that is about AI and what AI is out there doing that. It all sounds good, but it's not even truth. It's fake. It's not coming from real people. Right. And we got to be careful that what we're listening to isn't fake. It's coming from real people. Which is why our podcast is so important. And speaking of a real person, this is another listener, Shanice. And this is from our YouTube comments. She said that she's found these podcasts to be such a blessing, especially when you cover parenting. So it just shows you how many listeners out there are in need of parenting advice. And she said, I can't tell you how many times I've had these same conversations with other parents. So hearing you say what's been on my heart feels like a breath of fresh air. And she loved when we would say throughout the podcast, there's no hood like parenthood and that no truer words have ever been spoken. And she said it. It's true. The teenage years have felt like an uphill battle and we know what that's like. It's like you gotta drag em over the finish line. If you can just get them through the teenage years and put cotton in your ears when they act up, but stay consistent with your values. But she said this. I'm choosing to walk in confidence, standing firm in my faith and trusting God with every step. Thank you for pouring into us through these podcasts. I've laughed, I've cried, I have felt convicted and had plenty of aha moments with my husband. And these conversations have even sparked some meaningful and entertaining discussions around our dinner table. That's what it's all about, getting together and talking about it as a family, she said. And reminders that we are not navigating this journey alone. And no, you are not, Our listeners are not. We are in this with you. And again, if there's a podcast you've listened to that you've had questions or just need some parenting or marriage advice, put it in the comments, let us know, DM us on Instagram. We would be more than happy. It's our honor, it's a privilege for us to help families really build the business of successful homes. That's what we're all about. Well, we just as a staff, went through about five weeks of teaching. Every teaching leadership principle that I taught had to do with the family. Yeah, and how to juggle working together and ministering together and how to do it at office, but then how to do it at home, how to prep your kids up for the next. If God's ever going to call them into ministry, we hit all those things. So family is everybody's business, but it's really our priority here at Metro. So I just want to say this, this particular podcast, it's not possible for one without Mary and I'm so grateful that she's willing to get here and be so transparent. Grateful for my kids that step into the podcast booth and share their experiences with you and be so open and transparent. I'm thankful for, for AP Allen Paul, who's consistently staying with us to help us get this put out to you and keep you engaged and informed. And I'm grateful for Ashley on the other side of our glass where she's there consistently recording and helping us get this information out. We want to encourage you and be a blessing to you. So keep listening. Hang in there. We got season nine. We're recording great contents coming up and so we just want to say thank you one more time, guys. Thank you for listening to the Family Business with the Alessi's God bless you. Thanks so much for joining the family business today. If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to follow or subscribe, share with a friend and leave us a review. We appreciate your support and can't wait to have you join us next time because family is everybody's business.